Powerade

i don't have the power to open a bottle of Powerade.  i have to use a pair of channel locks pliers to open it.

Superman

When i was a kid, i wore a Superman tee shirt and everyone would beat me up.  Guess there was kryptonite everywhere i went.
My Dad was the real Superman was always helping others.

Curling

This sport combines housecleaning, a flat bottom bowling ball with a handle, with an ice rink.  i am practicing sweeping the floor in hopes of making it to Big Time Curling. I have converted my old bowling ball into a curling ball. I've flattened the bottom of the ball, attached a handle and filled the fingerholes. Even if i don't make it to Big Time Curling at least my apartment will be clean.

Steven Wright was Wrong

Or maybe he just Left.

Tes was right.

i used to be worried that someone would steal my stuff, so i bought and installed extra chain door locks, security cams and a security dvr, and a burglar alarm with motion detector and proximity switches .  Then i realized i had nothing worth stealing except my security cams, my security dvr, and my burglar alarm and motion detector.  So i took all that stuff down and locked it up in a room, so nobody could steal them.

Multitasking

There is a relationship between time and space.  i can multi task.  i can occupy space and waste time.

Sounds of Silence

The words of this song are very profound and poetic, but sometimes, i can't hear it.